Skip to main content

Baby, It's Cold Outside (and inside when you live in a world that doesn't understand consent)

I can't say #MeToo. I'm a male and, in many ways, on the "good" side of the double standard. This isn't even to correct forum for much of what I feel needs to be said (too many students read this blog). However, I really need to talk about a problem with one of our (not mine) beloved Christmas songs.

Each year, when we return from Thanksgiving break, I treat my students to a variety of lectures on problems with Christmas. I talk about the theological damage that Santa can cause (more on that in a later post). I talk about how annoying and odd the song "Christmas Shoes" is. Most seriously, I talk about the problems highlighted (highlit?) by "Baby It's Cold Outside".

I love a lot of what Frank Loesser wrote (Guys and Dolls, How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying). It's easy to write off this song as a product of a society that didn't respect the rights of women. The continuing popularity of the song shows that we are clearly still there.

If you are not familiar with the song, it is a call-and-response style duet in which a woman (identified in the original sheet music as "mouse") is seduced by a man ("wolf"). She makes a variety of statements to fend him off: "I really can't stay", "The answer is no", and perhaps most disturbing "What's in this drink?". The wolf responds with some rather disturbing things: "No cabs to be had out there", "What's the sense of hurting my pride?", "How can you do this thing to me?"

How can we possibly think this song is romantic? The fact that we do says that something is deeply, deeply wrong in our society. No means no. Simple.

Many people have defended this song to me as saying "The woman is clearly just teasing". That's an excuse that many men who are caught disrespecting women try. No means no.

Most of my favorite artists have covered this song. I have no idea why. It doesn't matter that eventually she says yes after he has continually disrespected her. The song implies that it is her decision to stay. It's not. No means no.

I hope this year our country will start to wake up to the underlying message of the song and start to push it off the radio.

PS: Last year, a songwriter changed the lyrics to reflect consent. It's an interesting take.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Analyzing Goertz Memes

 I often find myself on the Savio meme pages. Let's take a look at a few: 1. Handbooks I do read it quite a bit. We do some massive updating each summer. 2. Airpods I'm an Android user myself. I do think of the Airpod memes everything students walk past me wearing their earbuds (against the handbook, by the way). 3. Caaaw! Dr. Garcia started the noise. I don't do it as well. 4. Let it Go Well, yes. I was the one with the microphone and tiara. 5. Blue Shirt/Gold Tie Thank you. I think I look pretty good as well. 6. Saturated Because one time I said that the grass was saturated with rainwater. 7. Lunch There's a lot of lunch memes about me. Yes, I walk up and join conversations. I'm a socially awkward person, but it's allowed when you are an administrator. 8. Doors If you go through the wrong doors, I will find you and I will stop you. 9. History I don't know. Also, apparently my name no longer has a Z. Alright! First post in years.

My Issues with Harry Potter: Part 4 - The Education System

Okay, maybe it's because I'm not British, but the education system in the Wizarding world makes very little sense to me (a teacher). Granted, the American system doesn't make sense to much of the rest of the world. Here in the US, we don't have college entrance exams, so I won't criticize things like OWLs or NEWTs. However, I am going to have to criticize the entire theory of education. Primary Schooling A Hogwarts letter arrives on a student's 11th birthday (sort of). What are the options for students before they are 11? Rowling says that they may either go to public schools or they are home schooled. It sure seems like most magical parents choose the latter option (most wizards know nothing of the Muggle world, which should not be the case if they attended public school for 6 years). Here we run into our first problem. What exactly are these children being taught? In the US (and from what I can tell, the UK), parents are not required to fol

Social Contract in Disney's Wish

Spoilers for Disney's Wish This isn't a post attacking the movie. It was enjoyable. The music was okay. There were a lot of Easter eggs (you caught that each of her friends is based on one of the 7 Dwarfs, right?) But I take pleasure in overanalyzing things. Scroll down for today's issue. Mrs. Goertz brought up an interesting point this morning as she was singing This Wish from Wish. Was Magnifico's plan all that bad (not the monster that he became, but the original situation from the beginning of the movie)? Magnifico and Amaya founded the kingdom of Rosas to be a safe place free from the trauma of his own youth (the details of fuzzy, but I'm thinking war). Rosas seems like a good place, as near as we can tell: low crime, fairly egalitarian society, no concerns of outside attack. In fact, one of the first scenes shows that there is enough immigration that there is a position of tour guide to show newcomers around. Yes, the castle is a little large for one couple,